Inside the cave Oliva had run out of candy.
She hesitated for a while if she should continue or go back,
but realized that if she really concentrated, she should be able to
memorize the path between the last candy and Jesper.
So, she continued, and only a short while later
she reached the huge cavern. Even if it was rather
dark in the cavern, and the density of bald heads was surprisingly
high, she immediately recognized the
bald man taking to two bodybuilders
as Jesper. She ran to him, and threw herself in his arms:
"Darling! I finally found you!"
Jesper, by now a man very harden to meeting the unexpected
answered calmly:
"Olivia, what brought you to Fiji?"
"Darren."
Jesper's calm disappeared:
"D-D-D-Darren!? Darren the Dragon?"
"No, Darren the Penguin!
Of course I mean Darren the Dragon!
We both missed you and have come to help you out of the cave."
All the other men started to shout with joy,
but Jesper said surly:
"I rather stay than go out to Darren."
But after a while even Jesper realized that
there was not much future in
staying in the cave, and he agreed to be rescued.
However, in all the excitement of meeting Jesper,
Olivia had forgotten the memorized way out. Jesper,
still a lot smarter than the moron he usually was, suggested:
"Why can't you hypnotize a bat to show us the way out, Olivia.
I'll bet the bats know the shortest way out."
Olivia gave Jesper a pitiful,
but still friendly, smile and said:
"Maybe I could do that, but how are we going to catch one.
They are quick little fellows the bats."
"No they are not, at least not all of them. Some move no
faster than a very athletic turtle."
"Hahahaha!! In that case why don't you catch one for me."
Less than a minute later Jesper had caught one of the wingless
bats, which he gave to Olivia. When Olivia had overcome the chock
that wingless bats existed she hypnotized that bat, then she put
it down on the ground. It started to walk,
and all of the persons in the cave followed
the bat. After they had walked for a while the bat run
into
a gigantic egg.
The egg, that probably had contained a dinosaur,
was empty but almost complete, only a little
part on the top was missing. Jesper looked at the egg and said:
"Wow, what an egg. I always wished for an egg like that. I'll
take it with me, you'll never know when you might need it."
"I know. Never.", Tjoobee whispered to Beetjoo.
After the poor bat had come over the chock of
colliding with a gigantic egg, it continued to walk towards the
opening of the cave. The bat moved slowly, but after a while it
had led them to one of Olivia's Bon-Bons.
From that point they didn't need the bat anymore.
So, they said goodbye to the bat, and followed
the candy towards the opening of the cave.
Just when they expected to see the sun they saw that a big, fat
dragon was blocking their way out.
After our heroes had overcome
the disappointment of finding their way blocked by Darren the
Dragon, they started to look for ways to squeeze past him.
Soon they all realized that it was impossible to pass Darren.
It was also pretty obvious that Darren couldn't be moved.
Jesper, that seemed to be in deep thoughts, said slowly:
"There might just be one way out....."
"What way? Silly-Sam asked eagerly.
"The same way as the helicopter took yesterday.
Through Darren!"
Strangle enough no one seem to be impressed by Jesper's idea.
As they stood there Olivia noticed something under Darren:
"Look! Some liquid is streaming under Darren.
I bet it is water."
"I don't think it is water....", Darren confessed
looking a bit embarrassed.
"Dragon pee!", Jesper screamed sounding overjoyed.
He then turned to Tjoobee and Beetjoo and said:
"Do have any of your special drink with you."
"No, my bottle is empty.", Tjoobee said.
"But my bottle is filled.", Beetjoo said.
Jesper took charge over the situation and commanded:
"Quick, Tjoobee! Fill you bottle with Dragon pee!"
After Tjoobee with a suspicious facal expression
had done what Jesper told him to do, Jesper told
the others about his new fantastic plan how to come out:
"If we mix the two liquids in your bottles, incredible
amounts of gas is created. If we, before mixing them, pour
both bottles down Darren's throat, the gas will act like a jet stream
that will move Darren out of the cave!"
"But what if the gas find its way out of Darren through
the 'back-door'. Then the drag force will push him even deeper
into the cave", Beetjoo protested.
"Yes, good point. We must first somehow try to block that
exit, before we pour down the liquids."
So, since Jesper was the one that had come up with the idea,
the other chose Jesper to be a volunteer to climb down
Darren and plug the opening in Darren's interior, that led to
the intestinal canal. After protesting wildly for a few
minutes Jesper agreed to go down Darren's throat. One of the
bald morons had a rope, that Jesper attached around one of
Darren's front teeth. Dressed in the huge egg, to survive the
gastric juice, he then lowered himself into the dragon.
After reaching the bottom of Darren's stomach he paddled to the
lower exit and manage to plug the egg, with himself inside,
at the opening to the intestinal canal.
He then made a few prayers and held the rope with all of his
strength.
When the liquids started to come dripping down his silent prays
transformed to a horrified scream:
"Oh my God! What have done to deserve this!"
Jesper had just noticed that
Darren's stomach started to expand, when the pressure force made
him loose the grip of the rope. By a tremendous force Jesper,
still sitting in the egg, was accelerated through 87 meters
of dragon guts. He then flew out of Darren, and out of the cave
in a parabolic orbit towards the center of Fiji.
Just before he was about to be pierced by a sword,
that was a part
of a statue of the fonder of Suva, his orbit suddenly, and totally
unexpectedly, changed
direction. By, what seem like a miracle he ended up in the
swimming-pool outside Hotel Suva.
"Puh! That was close. But I saved his live.",
Wisper smiled and continued:
"Now I finally can understand why Saint Peter wanted to hear
the story behind his 'death'.
When Jesper landed in the pool, half of the water, and most of the
bathing people, flew out of the pool.
Even thought the last 60 hours had harden Jesper,
it took Jesper almost four seconds to
fully overcome the terrifying moments that presided
his rather spectacular entry.
After he had calmed down he got an
unpleasant feeling that all person around the pool were staring
at him. However, he decided not to pay
them any attention and climbed up from the pool, took the gigantic
egg under his right arm, and walked away whistling
'Who is afraid of the big bad wolf'.
Strangely, Jesper's cool behavior didn't stop the people from staring
at him. He walked into the hotel entree and continued to his room.
As he opened the door to his room, he heard his mother yelling:
"How long are you going to stay in the bathroom. I need to use it
real bad. Open the door!"
Jesper didn't bother about his mother, and she was too busy to notice
him. Instead he sat down in the armchair and took out his diary.
At first he was very surprised to find that he had forgotten
to write in it
yesterday, but then he remembered that he had a tough day yesterday,
and that he had no strength to write in it. However, today had been a
relatively calm day, so he decided to write for both days today.
'Dear Diary, sorry I forgot you yesterday, but I'll make it up
you by writing two days today instead.
Yesterday: I visited the circus-place. I had a ride on a camel,
and had a visit from my mother.
Today: I ate some strange French food.
I also walked in a cave, and took a short bath in a swimming-pool.
This morning I brushed my teeth with my finger.
He looked at what he had written, and made sure that he hadn't
forgotten anything. He then said to himself:
"Amazing that I have done all this, in only two days!
Finally my life is filled with interesting things.
Now I don't have to fill my diary
with my awful poems. Now my own life can fill my diary!"
Then he closed his eyes and fell asleep,
even though his mother was
screaming even louder in the background.
by Patrik Norqvist